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Shawn Puff, Author at GeeksHaveGame

RINGSIDE APOSTLES presents… FLASHBACK FRIDAY [Episode 16] – WWE In Your House IV: The Great White North!

It’s been a long time but after tons of requests (by me) we’re finally back with another Flashback Friday. I had to get the Waybach Machine a tune-up. Gas prices are ridiculous but whatever.

Let’s get this show on the road. We’re going all the way back to October 22, 1995. Fantasy by Mariah Carey is the number one song on the charts. Ironically, Christopher Lloyd is celebrating his 57th birthday. And where we’re going, we don’t need roads!! ..OK. Actually, we need roads in 1995, but you get the joke…

The show starts out with some up-and-coming Canadian singer doing, of course, the Canadian National Anthem. Whoever she was, I bet she wasn’t up-and-coming after that horribly off-key performance.

Fatu vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Rikishi was lucky that they evolved this gimmick into what it became. Why does it say, “Just Say No” on Fatu’s trunks? There is definitely a “crack kills” joke in there somewhere. Anyway. … Fatu superkicked Helmsley into the Attitude Era!!! Of course, Hunter wins. I’m not surprised at all. Lawler interviewed him after. Helmsley does a horrid British accent or whatever that was supposed to be. A snobby aristocrat maybe? After that vomit-inducing promo, Henry Godwinn chased Hunter away with a bucket of slop. Cool story. – 2.5/5 Molsons

TAG-TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP: Smoking Gunns (c) vs. Razor Ramon & 1-2-3 Kid

So Razor is on double duty? Really? Well, that’s fucking stupid. You couldn’t put anyone else in that spot? I get that they have matching gear for the first time but FFS! To start, I got distracted by the two guys in the front row trying to find their seats. I’m relieved they figured it out and he even gave the kid that was in his seat his Canadian Tuxedo back. Razor and the Kid look like they’ve been teaming for years. Billy & Bart are sloppy as fuck. Are you sure these two are brothers? Wait… So 1-2-3 Kid hot-shotted to get the pin, wasted time, pinned sloppily, and got rolled up? Wow. Talk about a fuck finish. Then the Kid attacked the Gunns after the match. It was a decent match until the end ruined it. – 2.25/5

Doc Hendrix does a WWF Shop promo and awkwardly suggests you could wake up to Bret Hart standing over you. No thanks.

Marty Jannetty vs. Goldust

This is Goldust’s in-ring debut. It’s dark and the arena is quiet because nobody knows how to react to what the hell they’re seeing. He actually looks like he fucking hates his life and this gimmick right now. Jannetty looks like he’s wearing one of the Ultimate Warrior’s armbands. For the record, Vince calling Goldie “androgenous” was pure gold. This character would get canceled today in 3.5 seconds. It would be labeled both transphobic and homophobic and probably three other types of phobic on top of that. Who the hell was that “Son of the Undertaker” looking weirdo in the crowd? That was an uneventful ending. And his finisher is a version of One Man Gang’s 747 suplex? What a flop. – 2.25/5

King Mabel vs. Yokozuna

Who booked this shit? Seriously. And who signed off on that this was a good idea? It hasn’t even started yet and I can imagine how slow, plodding and sloppy this is going to be. A few moves and someone rolls out of the ring so they can both catch their breath. The fans love this– I don’t know why. They did an entire segment of missed drops and splashes and the fans ate it up. Fuckin’ Canadians, eh? The ref called a double count-out. Then we got a way too long stare down followed by a hug and both men holding each’s hand up after Mo & Cornette talked them into it. – 1/5

Now Vince is confused as to where Doc Hendrix is. Doc Hendrix. Why does WWF have to change people’s names that are already established? Speaking of which, Dean Douglas? Really? Anyway, Gorilla Monsoon is in the ring and they bring Shawn Michaels out to relinquish the Intercontinental Title. In case you don’t know, HBK got his ass beat by a Marine outside of a bar so he couldn’t wrestle and Vince made him give the title up. Definitely more so because he picked a fight and got his ass beat. Douglas is named the champ and immediately defends it against… Razor Ramon.

INTERCONTINENTAL CHAMPIONSHIP: Razor Ramon vs. Dean Douglas (c)

This match went on way longer than it ever needed to. I can’t figure out why. Were they trying to not totally bury the guy that they just made the definition and picture of a transitional champion? And THEN, after all that, they have a fuck finish to crown Razor the champ? Really? Who booked this shit?!? – 2.25/5

Bret Hart comes out with a hockey sweater tucked into his jeans and goes after Jerry Lawler. Hart chases him away and takes his spot at the announce position.

WWF CHAMPIONSHIP: British Bulldog vs. Diesel (c)

I know they wanted to emphasize Bret being the next man up, but Bret does not belong in the booth. Vince is great because he has no problem just talking right over Bret. Bulldog took out Diesel’s leg early and the match just plodded on from there with Smith working the leg. This match works with a Bret Hart, but certainly not with a British Bulldog. I feel like they wanted Bret in this match but settled for Bulldog because they even had him attempting a sharpshooter.

Bulldog slaps Hart, who jumps up and pummels the Bulldog. This costs Diesel the match but not the title. OH BOY!! Another fuck finish!! I never would have guessed. Diesel was pissed so he started fighting with Bret. Officials and other wrestlers came out to try to separate them and we go off the air to this image. The biggest pop of this match came when Bret interfered. Ouch. – 2/5

OVERALL

Talk about lackluster. Too many fuck finishes. Too much shit that doesn’t make any sense. Too many long matches. I’m glad it was a short show. My favorite part was when they put the production graphic up to signify it being over. Yeah, it was that type of night. Good thing gas is only $1.14 a gallon in 1995 because I’m filling up and getting the hell out of here. 2/5 Molsons.

-Shawn Puff

WWE SUMMERSLAM 2022 [The Sean & Shawn Show Review]: No Waiting To Play The Game!

SHAWN PUFF: Holy shit. It’s been a long time! I don’t think we’ve done one of these since COVID. I thought I got us canceled!! Anyway, it’s that time of the year again. Beach weather is upon us and it’s time for the “Biggest Party of the Summer” … wait, since Vince is gone, do we have to use the silly catch phrases and can we finally call them belts again and “drop some E” … I just made that up. … But what’s a party without the RETURN of The Sean & Shawn Show BAY BAY!!!!

SEAN FARRELL: “It’s not a sprint, it’s a marathon“ to quote The Cerebral Assassin himself. It’s time to play the game!

SHAWN: OK. Let me start by saying this… Now that Vince is gone, we need to get rid of two brands and two women’s champions. There aren’t even enough females on the roster for that. And if you’re going to stick with that two title idea, at least make it a world and intercontinental championship. But I digress. This was a great opener. I don’t know why Becky wants to be an anime character, but if you really look at it, it’s kind of funny that her eccentric style is, in essence, female Seth Rollins. These two went out there and set the tone and put on a great match to open the show. Bayley returns at the end and then Dakota Kai returns and joins her and then Io Sharai — now called Io Sky — comes up and joins her. … Holy shit. THAT IS HOW YOU OPEN A SHOW. If this is what the Helmsley-McMahon Era is going to look like, I’m in. – 4/5

SEAN: Bianca put a statement on the one-year anniversary of her 26-second loss to Becks the last SummerFest. It never shoulda happened. This show started strong and hot. Becky took her loss and reminded everyone who the real workhorse of the Horsewomen is/was. Bianca has it. Dusty saw it, Hunter saw it, and now y’all can see it. For someone who never got a title run in NXT, she’s shown that she can carry that belt and be a champion. And then we got Bayley, looking like an Oompa Loompa with pants pockets fetish from the 90s X-Men. I kid, I kid. Mostly. Bayley automatically helps increase the quality of the women’s wrestling on both shows and I’m glad she’s back. Buuuuut she Isn’t alone! It’s CONTROL! Io & Dakota?!? I had prognosticated about who would come back to WWE with HHH at the helm. Totally didn’t see this happened. I don’t care what you call Io, she is magic in that ring. Dakota never should have been let go.  – 4/5

SHAWN: I don’t want to open each match by saying holy shit, but HOLY SHIT. Logan Paul has had two matches and he’s better than half of either roster. I’m sold. This kid is the real deal and going to make a big impact. I know some people hate this feud, but come on–it writes itself. The new reality star comes in and — of course! — Miz is going to take exception to him. It’s perfect. Does Logan Paul count as a celebrity wrestler anymore since he has a contract now, or is he the hands-down celebrity wrestler of the year once again already?? Oh yeah… and let’s not forget that I’m pretty sure we just saw the setup for Ciampa versus AJ Styles. Thank you, Hunter. – 4/5

SEAN: Well…. Paul got over as a babyface by the end of this match. Good for him. That shows just how damn great The Miz truly is. He understands someone like Paul coming from outside fame and trying to make it in the WWE. Miz did that. Miz climbed the mountain from jabroni dressing in the hallway to beating Cena at Mania for the belt. Logan put in the work and did the right moves. Now let’s see what he can actually do.. wrestling to me is more than just doing moves; tell a story, make me believe. And let’s get Ciampa in the ring now okay? Heard his ol buddy might be looking for work. – 3/5

SHAWN: And another thing, can we please stop dropping names and bring them back actually? I’m referring to him as Austin Theory and not just Theory. Fucking Vince. Also this was the most obvious outcome of the night since Austin Theory has the Money In The Bank briefcase and doesn’t need to win. I actually expected Dolph to get involved or Austin Theory to get disqualified. Don’t get me wrong; it wasn’t a bad match and all, and I’ll say until I’m blue in the face that Austin Theory is the future of the business. – 3/5

SEAN: Short and to the point. Lashley is a monster and Austin didn’t need to be going after two belts. A smart way of getting this done and over with. – 3/5

SHAWN: I’m not gonna say it.. I’m not gonna say hit.. How about, yes, Rey looked young again! I actually enjoyed a Rey Mysterio match, and I didn’t even hate Edge showing back up. Okay… Maybe I did hate that. I wanted the Mysterios to lose and Dominic to turn heel already!! Damn you, Hunter!! – 3.25/5

SEAN: Rey wrestled like he was 20, not like he has been here for 20! Dom still looks like he needs 2-3 years of NXT before coming back to the majors. But that horse is outta the barn and we’ll see if he can rise up to the challenge. Put the mask on kid, that might actually help sell you as an adult. Edge big return, is the…third time he’s done this since his last…big return? I’m sure the IWC is mad it wasn’t Bray/Fiend …. But Edge is always welcomed on my rasslin’ shows. – 3.5/5

SHAWN: Oh Bum-Ass Corbin. Always good for a good laugh. I know people hate him but this guy can turn shit into shitake bacon. Seriously. This was entertaining to start with the “Bum-Ass Corbin Choir”. Pat McAfee is pretty nasty, too, huh? I know he’s good on the stick but get this guy in the ring more. I’m sure they can find someone to take his place– or hire me. Just a thought. Next year, give me McAfee versus Paul for the Intercontinental Championship at SummerSlam, please. – 3.75/5 

SEAN: Let’s have Corbin be off tv for a while and return as the Lone Wolf. No more goofy-ass mid-card shenanigans. The dude is a big mobile safe-to-work-with guy who doesn’t deserve to be stuck in the mid-card for as long as he has been. He was miscast since his NXT call-up, but now that Daddy is home things should be changed for the better. Pat is someone who I’ve always found to be super entertaining. The law of diminishing returns will catch up to him if he keeps making these infrequent matches, but he never disappoints. Still a better wrestler than Logan Paul, Bad Bunny and Snoop combined. – 3.75/5

SHAWN: Can we acknowledge the Usos are dirty? I mean good dirty. They’re different than FTR and arguably the best high-flying tag team in history. Yeah. I said it. I don’t think I’m ever disappointed with an Usos match and this match was amazingly produced on top of that. Are we gonna see the Street Profits break up because they’re basically just the New Day 2.0 at this point? I guess it’s whatever. They’re just gonna push that clown Montez and his dancing ass. – 4.25/5

SEAN: I think I’m well past this feud. They all work super hard and do all that they can, but ya can’t keep this up forever. SPs shouldn’t split up, and the Uso’s can’t lose until after Roman does. Why are they still carrying both sets of belts? If you’re gonna unify them, unify them. Otherwise, we need/deserve two sets of champs.  – 4.25/5

SHAWN: Holy s… Dammit, I almost said it again. But Matt Riddle is here and he’s not medically cleared and he’s calling out Seth!!! I wasn’t expecting this to happen. And Riddle gets curb stomped and that puts a quick end to that. I wonder how long it’s going to put Riddle on the shelf. Brooooooooo…3/5

SEAN: I was wondering what was to become of Seth. Was he pulled as backup *break Incase of Brock BooBooFace and doesn’t show*? Was this match cut just to save time for a show that nearly went 4-hours? Got a ton more heat on Seth and Riddle starting the shed that goof skin and hopefully less Orton mannerisms too. – 3.25/5

SHAWN: I guess you can’t go an entire night without a single fuck finish. At least this one made sense. Ronda got screwed. She turned heel, which was very much needed. Liv gets a successful title defense. It’s a win/win. This wasn’t the greatest match of the night but it told a story and it did a good job doing that. – 2.5/5

SEAN: Liv does nothing for me. She always looks scared, and overwhelmed and comes across as a 16-year-old trying to pass herself off as 21. But at least she wants to be there. Rousey is lousy. She’s been a one-trick pony her entire career. Now in two professions. The finish was creative but didn’t really do Liv any favors. Yes she won, yes she tapped, but it got the job done. – 2.25/5

So y’all thought it was a good Idea, in an open air arena, with thunderstorms threatening all day to delay the show, to send DREW out ….. carrying a giant metal sword to promote a PPV 5 weeks away. Well, the promo was solid. Thankfully it wasn’t …. Shocking! 

SHAWN: This is the one that nobody was waiting for. Had it been a five-star match it still would go unnoticed because people are sick of Brock versus Roman. What is this, Brock/Roman XXVII?? Fuck. The addition of the tractor was intriguing and you knew it was going to be used somehow. On the other hand, I’d be pissed if I paid ten large to sit front row and have the end of the main event blocked by the ring half lifted in the air. PISSED. Haha — but they gave us the whole shebang. Theory almost cashed in but got knocked the fuck out instead. The Usos get involved and get manhandled for a bit. Brock gets put down about five times and somehow gets back to his feet each time, but the numbers game is eventually too much. You know the drill. Now acknowledge your tribal chief. – 4.25/5

SEAN: Then. Now. Together. Forever. It feels like every time these two clash everyone is mad they’re doing it again. Not me. I loved this. It was bonkers. Brock driving the tracker, doing his own mic introduction, Roman nonchalantly catching said mic, and then BANG A GONG it was on! Instead of one move and standing around and gawking Brock was going 100 mph right from the get-go and Roman did all that he could to survive the Alpha male. Once Roman got his time he took it to the Beast and they literally beat each other from pillar to post. Brock and that ring destruction were hilarious and I sorta feel bad for those ringside seats. But it is what it is. Heyman got F5’ed! The ending was great. If this was Brock’s legit swan song, what a hell of a way to end a career. The only way he was stopped was by dropping the damn building on him. – 4.75/5

SHAWN: This was a really good show. Probably the best WWE pay-per-view since sometime Pre-COVID. The rumors are swirling as to who’s going to be brought back into the fold and what’s going to happen to NXT now that the regime has changed. But if last night is any sign of what the future of this company is going to be about then I’m in and I’m sure by this time next year WWE will be the place to be again. I can’t wait to see what happens this week and move forward. I think the future is bright in the E. And let’s not forget that we’re calling the WRESTLERS again. Michael Cole was actually good tonight! In fact, that whole announce team was good. Sean, I’m sure you appreciated that. 

Matches = 3.5/5, Entertainment = 4.5/5, Overall = 4/5 Whiskeys

SEAN: Everything about this show was great. You can’t change everything overnight. It’s an aircraft carrier, not a sailboat. Start with the verbiage, and have the announcers announce! Cole was a fanatic! Saxton was great! Corey got to be Corey again! Wrestlers getting more say in what they say and how they say it! “Banned moves” back because the 700-year-old man isn’t around anymore. This should have happened 10-years ago not 10 days. I’m excited about the future of this company. Everything is changed. As the man in the black hat likes to say “Business, is about to pick up !”

Matches = 3.5/5, Entertainment = 5/5, Overall = 4.25/5 Whiskeys.

A WWE PPV with 4-4.25 Whiskey Bibles… When was the last time that happened?!

-Shawn Puff & Sean Farrell

WWE WRESTLEMANIA 38 [Night 1 Review]: Cody Does Dallas.

“Pastor” Shawn Puff
@ShawnPuffy

It’s finally here!! The grand-daddy of them all, the show of shows, the “showcase of the immortals”!

Last night and tonight, it’s…

Or is it Sports Entertainment Mania now? I don’t know.. but this weekend has been wild. I’ve consumed more wrestling from my home than any human ever should in a single weekend.  Anyway, Mania is now a two-night extravaganza. By the way, this company that everybody hates sold over 70,000 tickets, which isn’t too shabby for a shitty company that nobody likes anymore.

But enough trolling the IWC, they’re going to be in enough tears when Shane-O-Mac shows up as Seth’s opponent tonight. That said.. there was absolutely no need for a two-hour kickoff show with zero matches– especially when the US and Intercontinental titles aren’t even on the card. Damn you, Vince!! Anyway, let’s pour a glass of whiskey, sit down and take in the biggest show of the year. It’s time for WrestleMania 38, Night 1!!

SmackDown Tag Team Championship:
Shinsuke Nakamura & Rick Boogs vs the Usos (c)

Damn, do they misuse Shinsuke. This match was a lot shorter than it should have been. Boogs blew out his knee and left Shinsuke to fight the Usos, two on one. Nakamura got off a few good moves in but it was basically a handicap match the rest of the way and a 1D put Nak down rather quickly.

We found out later on that Boogs’ injury was real. He tore his quad and damaged his patella and needs surgery.  I mean, that would explain how the remainder of the match went and why it ended so quickly. If this is a sign of the night to come, I might need to crack open the good whiskey.2/5

Drew McIntyre v Happy Corbin

Wait… did Samantha Irvin just call Happy Corbin undefeated? Come on. Sure, he hasn’t lost since his “name change” but that doesn’t constitute undefeated. I love that Pat McAfee called him Bum Ass Corbin before he changed his name. Corbin looked strong to start this match. McIntyre doing a tope suicida was pretty insane.

This one was a slight step up from the opener but not by much. Corbin is no longer undefeated and this match felt like it belonged on SmackDown or the Kickoff Show. Which, by the way, why was this match here instead of Ricochet defending his title? Who booked this shit, Bruce? Oh great, McIntyre destroyed the ring ropes so the next match is going to take a bit before it happens. Time for more whiskey.2.75/5

Rey & Dominik Mysterio vs Miz & Logan Paul

HOLY SHIT!!! LOGAN PAUL IS FRICKIN GOOD!!!! Give this kid a damn contract. This was the best match so far tonight and it shocked the world. Logan pulling off the Three Amigos AND a GREAT Frog Splash with a little shoulder shimmy on the top rope!! I don’t like this kid at all, but I have to give him credit. He did a bang-up job. Logan Paul looks better than Dominik, to be honest. Logan Paul may be the greatest sports entertainer ever.  

Anyway, this match might be the turning point of the night. After the match, Miz turning on Paul just set up his first feud if they keep him around. I’m sure we’ll, at the very least, get Miz versus Logan Paul at Backlash or SummerSlam. This felt like Mania to me. The other two should have been in that horrendously long kickoff show. THIS started the night of Mania. – 3.25/5

Stephanie McMahon comes out and introduces Gable Steveson to us. So, the Olympic Gold Medalist will NOT be the swerve on us to face Seth Rollins. Has Shane been seen in Dallas? Hahaha. Interesting that this kid is getting the bump directly to the main roster and skipping NXT. I guess that’s what happens when you win a gold frickin medal WITHOUT a broken frickin neck. Can’t wait to see what this kid brings to the table.

RAW Women’s Championship:
Bianca Belair vs Becky Lynch (c)

Here we go with the over-the-top entrances finally. That marching band. Fire. OK. We’re definitely at Mania now. These two women put on a hell of a battle. If you’re looking for good women’s matches to watch this weekend, this might be the best of them. This will be on my list for the women’s match of the year. The entrances also set the stage perfectly for the culmination of this feud.

Bianca had her WrestleMania Moment stolen from her last year by a returning Becky Lynch and this year she recaptures her moment. Great match overall and almost the show-stealer. If they really wanted a women’s match to be the main event tonight, they should have gone with this one. – 4.25/5

Seth Rollins vs Mr. McMahon’s Hand-Picked Opponent (Cody Rhodes)

So, after much speculation, rumors and to-do, we finally find out who Seth’s mystery opponent is going to be. Seth gets sung in by a chorus. That was weird. And Cody Rhodes came home!! So, we have our first impactful cast off from AEW that lands in WWE. Not saying it means anything, but I would take note: This was a great wrestling match. Cody may have just had the match of his career with Seth Rollins. Definitely Match Of The Year contender right here. He even got a little homage to Dusty in there. Now let’s be real. Cody needed this. This was the only way this comeback would have worked.

I know everyone always looks at what Vince does wrong but they forget about what he does right. Sometimes you need to go away and prove yourself somewhere else to get the push. Remember the Chosen One, Drew McIntyre, or Christian? They proved themselves and then came back and went to the moon. Now, I don’t know that that’s the plan here but don’t doubt it until it gives you a reason to. I mean, we might have just witnessed the greatest WrestleMania Moment in the history of WrestleMania. Cody came home. Holy shit! – 4.5/5

SmackDown Women’s Championship
Ronda Rousey vs Charlotte Flair (c)

This match was done a disservice for coming after Cody’s return. It was kind of sloppy. I don’t know if it’s Ronda or if Charlotte just isn’t really at the level that WWE puts her at for her name. Logan Paul looked better than Charlotte Flair. They had their moments, don’t get me wrong, but after the last two matches, it just wasn’t the same.

It picked up and got a lot better but the first half was pretty rough. Ronda got out of the Figure Eight and kicked out of a Natural Selection. Neither woman would tap. The ref got knocked out and it cost Rousey the title in a fuck-finish. We couldn’t go the whole night without one right? Of course, it was in the main event. I should have gone to bed before this match. Overall, it wasn’t the worst match but compared to the two that preceded it, this was meh. – 3.5/5

K.O. Show with Stone Cold Steve Austin:
Kevin Owens vs Stone Cold Steve Austin

The big question was, would this turn into a match? I mean after the actual main event I went in HOPING it would save the main event. Luckily for us, it did. And no holds barred at that. It was great to see Austin back in the ring. Austin drank beer and stomped mudholes. They went out into the crowd and up the ramp and Austin took some bumps that I never thought I’d see him take again. This got the crowd back into it to end the night. Both men ate Stunners and Austin came out victorious in the end.

After the match, it was time for beers, beers and more beers followed by another Stunner for KO. And just when you thought it was done, Stone Cold shared a beer with Byron Saxton and Stunned the hell out of him then celebrated with his real-life brother. This is how you send the crowd home happy and buzzing in Texas. And there’s still one more night! Can night two outdo what we just watched? – 4/5

Cody came home

Above all, Mania’s first night really didn’t disappoint. Clearly, it started off slow and really bumpy, but it slowly reached true Mania level. In the end, we got an amazing Mania Moment recaptured for Bianca and one for Stone Cold and KO that the entire arena enjoyed. In addition, Logan Paul shocked the world because he’s actually pretty damn good at this. And of course. “the greatest WrestleMania Moment in the history of Mania” came with Cody Rhodes returning home. Hopefully, Rick Boogs heals up quickly, but what happened to the New Day versus Sheamus and Ridge Holland? Guess they got the bump. Maybe on the night two kickoff show? They could use a match or two on that two hours of nothing. In fine, I thoroughly enjoyed night one of WrestleMania and will be looking forward to night two. Now, more whiskey.

Matches = 3.5/5
Entertainment = 4.25/5

Night 1 Overall = 3.75/5 Whiskeys.

-Shawn Puff

WWE ROYAL RUMBLE 2022 [Review]: Ultimate Fighting Champs?

 

Felipe: Finally. The event we’ve all been waiting for: The Return of the Bella Twins

Oh, also the Royal Rumble

Shawn: God, do I hate the Bella Twins. Why does it feel like someone didn’t think about the Royal Rumble until after the “budget cuts”?? Welp. Here we are. Let’s get this shit show on the road. The Road to WrestleMania starts NOW!!

UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP – Roman Reigns (c) v Seth Rollins

Felipe “The 3rd Deacon” Crespo
@F7ovrdrv

Felipe: Fuck me– they opened with Reigns vs Rollins. 

First off, the way this match started — I mean that very literally — with Rollins’ intro: one of my favorite heel moments. Ever. Not only that, but Seth using the Shield outfit and moveset? Fantastic. 

As far as the match itself is concerned, these two proved why they’re at the top of the wrestling food chain (no, I don’t mean WWE food chain). The way they know each other, how in tune they are with their characters, and their history provided one of my favorite matches between them. 

Now there’s the ending. Many will hate it, and I get it. But as someone that has seen them both since their NXT days (even Reigns’ Thoroughbred phase), I’m more than happy to see this play out this way. Hopefully, it culminates at WM4.5/5 Revenge Chair Shots.

“Pastor” Shawn Puff @ShawnPuffy

Shawn: Well that was long-winded as fuck. This was the Match of the Night without a question, and all the things Felipe said. I loved the SHIELD entrance and attire.  It’s not often that you get heel versus heel and it works and makes sense but it definitely did here.

But these two know each other so well that it’s probably impossible for them to put on a less than stellar match so I didn’t expect any less. What a way to open the show. My one concern… how do you follow that? 4.5/5 Whiskeys.

Women’s Rumble Match

Felipe: YO MOMMA LONG WINDED… Sorry.  Women’s Rumble time. (Spoiler alert: Dana Brookes isn’t winning.) The Rumble itself was good. But I am so tired of Charlotte. And the second I heard Ronda’s music, I knew she’d win. Yawn. Really hoping for Morgan and Logan vs Bella Twins at WM, though. 3.5/5 … Then Ronda’s music hit and Charlotte HAD to be protected above all else, then it got bumped down to 2/5 stars. And where the hell is Asuka? 

Shawn: Rumor and innuendo is that Asuka will return from her shoulder injury next month. Anyway… not a bad Rumble. It was cool seeing all the faces we haven’t seen in a while. Mickie James got the second biggest pop of the night. As soon as Ronda Rousey‘s music hit it was obvious who was winning though. 3.5/5 Whiskeys.

RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP – Becky Lynch (c) v Doudrop

Felipe: Match was fine. Not great, not bad, just fine. Becky has been boring to me for a while, though. I don’t care, is what I’m saying. 2.5/5 Whiskeys

Shawn: I think I’m over Becky. Yup. I am. Well, this match … happened. Predictable and nothing special. This might have worked better if it wasn’t following the Women’s Rumble in my opinion. Oh well. 2.5/5 Whiskeys

WWE CHAMPIONSHIP – Brock Lesnar (c) v Bobby Lashley

Felipe: Holy. Shit. The match did not disappoint. At all. And while I wish the match would’ve straight up stayed clean 1-on-1 with no shenanigans, from a storyline perspective, it was great and unexpected. Would’ve preferred Lashley getting the title back without help, but I’m not mad either. 4/5 … WTF JUST HAPPENED!?

Shawn: The hell if I know.  …“It’s a swerve bro.” Really good match. I think the fuck finish gives us a reason for a part two down the road and it actually made sense in that it got us back to where we should be after the Day One COVID shift. Creative DOESN’T suck ALL the time! Wow. Bravo. 4/5 Whiskeys

The Grit Couple (Edge & Beth Phonix) v the It Couple (Miz & Maryse)

Felipe: I’ve never been an Edgehead. Barely paid attention, tbh. Love Miz, but I just can’t stand Edge. And he won. Ugh. What I did see was technically sound, so I’ll give them… 2/5 mehs

Shawn: I couldn’t agree more. But the fans wanted to see Edge and Beth get the win and this was that feel-good match. I wish Edge would just go away but we all know that’s not happening.  It was definitely a decent match all things considered. 3/5 Whiskeys 

Men’s Rumble Match

Felipe: A lot of years, I don’t really care about the title matches and just want to get to the Rumbles. This year was the complete opposite. And it didn’t help that both Rumbles had a case of “oh it’s that music.. They’re winning”.

Not only did this Rumble feel average at best, but once Lesnar’s music hit, you knew he was getting that Charlotte-like protection. Yawn.  Lesnar wins. Lol. 2.25-2.5/5 Whiskeys.

Shawn: Welp. That was more than disappointing. Did Vince find out TK trademarked Forbidden Door so he closed it on everyone else? People were waiting for Okada, Moose, or Cody and got Bad Bunny, Shane McMahon, and Brock Lesnar. And Brock wins. This is what happens when Nick Khan releases everyone that anybody actually cares about. Fuck off. This was so bad that Kofi botched his usual spectacular save spot so bad they couldn’t let it go. Worst. Rumble. Ever. 1.5/5 Whiskeys (although I could use some more after that shit show)

The obligatory WrestleMania sign point by Ronda

Felipe: I’m torn. From both a wrestling and storytelling perspective, both title matches were bangers, but the Rumbles themselves were just average. Not to mention both had predictable “their music hits, it’s over” winners.

Personally, I feel seeds have definitely been planted for great stories leading to Mania. And I can’t wait to see how they move forward with Rollins and Reigns. Not to mention who challenges Bobby now that he has the belt back. 3.5/5 Whiskeys (with all heavy lifting done by the title matches).

Shawn: Overall, this wasn’t that impressive of a show. It didn’t feel like the beginning of the Road to WrestleMania, that’s for sure. Outside of the two world title matches there wasn’t anything really worth talking about. And the men’s Rumble may have been the worst Rumble in the history of the Rumble. And Hacksaw Jum Duggan won the first Rumble. … But we did get Ronda pointing at the WrestleMania sign and Brock doing it too while we went off the air. That’s good shit pal! Am I right? Am I right? 3/5 Whiskeys.

-Shawn Puff & Felipe Crespo

THE SEAN & SHAWN SHOW [Episode 1]: NXT TakeOver – Vengeance Day #PatWasRight

Fi-nal-ly! The Sean & Shawn Show has come to.. You-Tuuuuube. Your fav — or most hated!?! — Ringside Apostles smarks — Sean Farrell & Shawn Puff — join forces to talk “Vengeance Day” with the NXT TakeOver​ fallout…

Throw in some Impact Wrestling​ discussion, a little WWE​ Elimination Chamber​ preview and more rumors and innuendo from Dirt Sheet Sean, and you have one hell of a debut. Tune in!

Ringside Apostles Presents… FLASHBACK FRIDAY [Episode 15]: December To Dismember.

“Pastor” Shawn Puff
@Shawn Puffy

It’s Friday once again and we all know what that means. It’s time to get out your fanny pack, put on your Cross Colors, and pull your walkman out of storage. OK. You might not need to get all of that stuff out.

First, we’ll start with the good ole’ Waybach Machine. Fire that bad larry up and let’s get some dates put in. We’re going to December 3rd, 2006. Next, we need to set the location. This week, we’re heading to James Brown Arena in Augusta, Georgia. Yeah, that’s right. We’re heading to ECW December to Dismember! In case you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m your boy Shawn Puff, and this… is Flashback Friday.

Before we get started, we need a disclaimer. This is WWE’s version of ECW, so we have to keep that in mind. Joey Styles is the commentator with Tazz so at least we get the feel of a real ECW show. Incidentally, this is the first elimination chamber match for ECW. I’m pretty sure it’s also the last, but I could be wrong. My hopes are that we don’t get the Yeti or the Mummy. Geesh, that was bad creative.

MNM w/ Melina vs The Hardy Boys – For starters, the fans are insanely behind the Hardy’s. I almost felt like I should be cheering for them too. Second, who told Joey Mercury it was a good idea to braid his hair? They should be fired. This is a good opener, but I do have to ask, can someone stick something in Melina’s mouth so she stops screaming? Please. Wait… Jeff Hardy has braids too? WTF? Who is doing their hair? Was 2006 the year of braids in WWF?

Of course, Melina gets involved. Jeff, being the white trash he is, took control and knocked her off the apron. I’m sure this is going to have something to do with the outcome. Moments later, I find out I’m wrong about that. The Hardys hit a Swanton on BOTH members of MNM and get the win. – 3.5/5

Matt Striker vs Balls Mahoney – Striker comes out and ran his mouth in the ring. He says this will be fought under Striker rules. Whatever those are. I’m actually pretty sure that nobody knows what the hell he is even talking about. Striker has a picture of his face on his ass. No top ropes. There’s one of his rules. I don’t see Mahoney going to the top much anyway. What is the actual point in that? Whatever. Balls gets the win and nobody really cares. – 1/5

Next, we find Sabu laid out in the back with paramedics and officials around him. Paul Heyman shows up asking what happened and says Sabu is in his main event. Paramedics put him on a stretcher and the fans chant bullshit. Basically.

Sylvester Terkay & Elijah Burke vs the FBI (Tony Marmaluke & Lil’ Guido) w/ Trinity – I don’t remember Terkay at all. Also, I don’t know who Trinity is. but I’d like to find out. Wow. My first question is, whatever happened to Big Sal? This wasn’t a very competitive match at all. It actually isn’t even worth talking about.  Burke and Terkay win easily. – 1/5

Daivari w/ The Great Khali vs Tommy Dreamer – Khali gets sent to the back for interfering early in this one. Damn. Khali vs Dreamer would have been such a better match. Daivari rolls up Dreamer and grabs a handful of tights to get the pin. Tazz is confused. So am I. What in the actual fuck is going on? Dreamer chases Daivari and Khali cuts him off on the ramp. Khali chokeslams him onto the ramp and he and Daivari stand over a fallen Dreamer. What a waster of time. 1/5

Paul Heyman announces Hardcore Holly in the elimination chamber. The fans aren’t too excited about it. Can you blame them? You pay for Sabu and get Bob Holly. Fuck off.

Mike Knox & Kelly Kelly vs Kevin Thorne & Ariel – WWE has never done intergender matches right. I’m sure this one is going to be more of the same bullshit along those lines. Pretty sure Thorne bit Ariel’s neck before the match started. I don’t even know. Tazz keeps getting lost over Ariel and Kelly Kelly.

By the way, I was right. When a woman tags in, the other woman needs to tag in. Wow. Mike Know just turned on Kelly Kelly and left her in the ring to deal with Ariel and Kevin Thorne by herself. Ariel easily gets the pin. After the match, Ariel continues to assault Kelly until Sandman showed up! Sandman gets in the ring and whoops Thorne with his kendo stick. Well, that’s a way to steal an extra point in your match rating. 2/5

Whoa. Who is Rebecca? And why don’t I know her? I actually rewound this just to see her again. She’s interviewing Bobby Lashley and talking about his past with the Big Show. We see a clip with Big Show vs Lashley and Paul Heyman making sure Show won. Bobby says he’s confident he will win even with the deck stacked against him.

Paul Heyman comes out to introduce the elimination chamber match. Heyman has guards surrounding him in riot gear. He announces that Sabu has been taken out and the fans chant bullshit. Heyman says Sabu’s day is past. Heyman says to fast forward to 2006 or 2007 and that the Big Show will still be the ECW champ and carrying the company on. Little does Paul know that after 342 face/heel turns, Big Show won’t be the champ and ECW will be dead.

Extreme Elimination Chamber – ECW Championship: Big Show (c) vs CM Punk vs Test vs Bobby Lashley vs Hardcore Holly vs Rob Van Dam – First, this is a different kind of elimination chamber as there are weapons in the pods and all around the ring. RVD and Hardcore Holly start out with the other four competitors in the pods. RVD flies around the ring, even clinging to the chamber cage and jumping onto a prone Holly.

This was vicious from the start. CM Punk is the first one out of the pod and he has a chair with him. Van Dam ended up split open and Holly worked over Punk. He hit a superplex and RVD tried to steal a pin and eliminate Punk. All three competitors are hurting as we prepare for entrant number four.

The buzzer sounds and Test comes in with a crowbar. He immediately attacks Punk and then grinds the end of the crowbar into RVD’s head. Somehow a bloody RVD was able to fight back with a chair. I wonder if that blood happened the hard way. RVD hits a five-star frog splash and gets the three count on Punk. The ref then counted Hardcore Holly down but it didn’t seem like it and everyone missed it. Meanwhile, Van Dam climbs to the top of Show’s pod and gets his foot grabbed by Big Show. Test tossed Van Dam to the mat and delivered an elbow from the top of the pod and eliminated RVD.

In total, half of the combatants are eliminated and Test is waiting for the next person to be released from the pod. Lashley is the next one in but Heyman’s henchmen locked him in. Huh? This makes no fucking sense. Why would you lock him in? You can’t beat him now. This is dumb. Whoa. Lashley busted himself out of the pod by using the table to break the chains on the top of the pod. Well, it’s obvious that Test is going to get his ass kicked now. He’s got four minutes on his own with Lashley. Bobby Lashley hits a spear and eliminates Test with over one-minute left.

Heyman screams at Show to not underestimate Lashley. Meanwhile, Lashley gets that table out of his pod and comes to Show’s pod to wait for him. Big Show brings the barbed wire bat with him and stares down Lashley. Show swings the bat at Lashley and smashes his chair. Show gets his bat stuck in the chains of the cage next. Lashley throws Big Show through the pod and followed him in dropping fists on Show’s head.

Show is bleeding and snorting and spitting everywhere and lays out Lashley with a clothesline. Next, he goes for a chokeslam but Lashley reverses it into a DDT. Lashley reverses a power slam, bounces off the ropes, and hits a spear. The Show is down and Lashley gets the three count and is the new ECW Champion!! That was very unbelievable for the record. 3/5

In general, this show started out strong and ended strong with a bunch of shit in between. I mean, a BUNCH of shit. The Kelly Kelly/ Mike Know story was cringe. To be clear, Striker only had a job because of the publicity he got from getting fired as a teacher for going to wrestling bookings. (Kind of epic. I won’t lie.)

Taking Sabu out of the match for Hardcore Holly was not only pointless but actually pretty stupid seeing as the ECW fans that were in the building were a lot more excited to see Sabu than Sparky Frickin’ Plug. Basically, it’s completely understandable why ECW died when you watch this. This was the drizzling shits.

Overall = 2/5 Bibles

-Shawn Puff