SDCC: Tournament of Spectacle, Logic, and Strawberry Milkshakes!

Saturday night, post-convention floor hours, pre-party time, in the YouTube Lounge on 7th St., nerds from around the world (okay, more like a lot of die hard fans from L.A. and a few people from other parts of the U.S.) gathered in the limited seating, ample standing room zone by the cramped stage to witness a live show of the Nerdist Channel‘s Tournament of Nerds.  Judges Marc Andreyko (Manhunter, Torso), John Hennigan (WWE), Zack Pearlman (The Virginity Hit, MTV’s The Inbetweeners) and Ben Garant (Reno 911) were seated at a harsh angle so as to leave as much playing space for the competing nerds and hosts, the delightful Hal Rudnik and Justin Donaldson, as possible.

The air conditioning couldn’t keep up with the number of sweaty bodies; the sound effects and timers were all delayed; and if you were sitting on the wrong side of the stage, you might have missed the resident mascot/ring card girl, “Nerd Girl”, altogether (she was relegated to the back corner behind the judges table).  But despite the less than ideal conditions and the extra pungent body odor — already a prevalent factor at Comic-Con (Editor’s Note: God, you’re telling me!!) — joy and enthusiasm reigned amongst audience members, judges, and participants alike.

The first match-up was a battle of classic video game heroes Link, defended by Andrew Wollman, from the long running Legend of Zelda franchise and Pac-Man, defended by internet personality and author, Maddox, from . . . err . . . Pac-Man.  Now, unlike the show currently airing on Nerdist, in the live show, the judges decide to victor.  Except in the event of a tie, which we encountered right off the bat, with Link arguing in favor of his variety of talents and 25 years of history and Pac-Man claiming that Link was, in fact, a terrorist (c’mon, he carries bombs, runs around the desert whispering secret messages to decidedly ethnic persons, and once was involved with woman . . . man? called Sheik).  Despite the accusations, nerdly devotion to a gaming legend prevailed over patriotism by a hair and the audience voted in favor of Link.

The next round saw a battle between girl Saturday morning cartoon icons Jem, defended by Lindsay Katai, and My Little Pony, defended by Dax Herrara.  Jem killed it with her arsenal of achievements, among them providing a home for orphaned children and winning the Indy 500.

Next!

Mr. Spock (Mike Carlson) defeated Dr. Huxtable (James Ross) in the next battle, despite the fact that Ross knew the names of all the Huxtable children and attempted to bribe the judges/audience with Jello pudding snacks.  The final, somewhat obscure match-up in the first round was Daniel Plainview (Jonny Svarzbein, with Justin Michael as his “son” H.W.) vs. The Plants from The Happening (defended by Roger Barr).  Since no one has actually seen The Happening, except John Hennigan who says he watched most of it and it would have been much more entertaining had Barr played the plants, Daniel Plainview moved on.

Paying homage to his “thank you for voting” videos that can been seen upon selecting a winner in an episode of Tournament of Nerds on the Nerdist YouTube Channel, Jason Sheridan was up next as Andy Rooney with a special Comic-Con report, wherein he detailed how Comic-Con would be different if he were running the show.

Mostly, this included a lack of party time following convention floor hours and 4 AM continental breakfasts.

In the semi-finals Jem defeated Link, because Marc Andreyko couldn’t help but vote for the person who looked like a drag queen (nevermind the fact that Link accused her purple haired boyfriend of being gay – to which she replied, “Link, gay-bashing? That’s funny”).  Plainview prevailed over Mr. Spock, due to his steak prop, reportedly obtained at 7 Eleven (it was not- but he may or may not have reheated it in a microwave in said convenience store).

Following that was a Tournament of Nerds staple and always highlight of the show: “The Roast of (insert He-Man character here)” performed by Skeletor (the hilarious UCB L.A. writer/performer Nick Wiger).  Up this time was his right hand man, Beast-Man, who, as is often the case in these Skeletor bits, apparently engages in a lot of sexual activity of the homosexual variety.

The final battle was a clash of strategies.

Throughout the evening, Lindsay Katai, as Jem, presented a series solid arguments in favor of the 80s cartoon rock chick, while Jonny Svarzbein’s only real argument was that Daniel Plainview was rich – though he certainly provided plenty of entertainment value via interactions between himself and H.W.

In the final round, Katai faltered a bit when Svarzbein emerged with a milkshake and whole bunch of straws taped together in the middle of her rebuttal to set up his final bit. However, though Jonny did manage to drink the entire milkshake from a distance — complete with a whole bottle of Southern Comfort (blech!) — reasoning triumphed, and the judge’s ruled in favor or the person who actually had an argument.

Huge congrats to Lindsay Katai whose first two rounds of debates were among the best this Sister has ever witnessed.

And I pop up at this show a lot.

If you’re not watching the Tournament of Nerds on the Nerdist channel you should be for the following reasons. One: You will actually know who most of the people mentioned in this article are, since most of them have already or are slated to appear on an episode. Two: You will be supporting a project that hosts Hal and Justin have worked very hard on for a very long time. And Three: If you know me, you will absolutely hear me laughing in the audience in the video below.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiQ5D0wfSGE&feature=channel&list=UL

Told ya so.