Thanks to our friends at the American Cinematheque (at the world famous Egyptian Theatre) and fellow blog Dammaged Goods, your Monsignor was able to recollect 25+ years of memories last night with a double feature of The Transformers: The Movie (1986) and G.I. Joe: The Movie (1987).
Yeah, I’m that damn flipping old.
Good thing is, none of our fine — and often super funny — panelists felt that way during the historic event’s Q&A on Saturday night in Hollywood; and GodHatesGeeks has the screening intermission here for ya in its entirety.
Enjoy listening to all the goods from all the greats in our SoundCloud player below, with the likes of Bill Ratner (voice of Flint, Mass Effect), Michael Bell (voice of Duke, Prowl), Pro Wrestling Hall of Famer Hank Garrett (Dial Tone), and writers Buzz Dixon, Flint Dille, Donald F. Glut, Neil Ross (Springer, Shipwreck), Joe storyboard director Larry Houston and director Don Jurwich. Cobra-la-la-la-la-la-la!!!
https://soundcloud.com/travis-moody-2/gi-joe-and-transformers-q-and-a
Hope you enjoyed that!
Now, onto my little Sambo Animation Face-Off. While there have been several comics depicting both Hasbro/IDW Comics properties going tooth, screwgun and nail against each other in the past, one has to wonder why we haven’t yet witnessed the crossover in animation or even live feature yet (well certainly the latter is due to the films being bad, for the most part)– besides this one moment…
Surely last night, The Transformers had the honorable distinction of going first– which allowed for two completely unfair disadvantages: A.) Geeks who really hate G.I. Joe (then wtf would you be here… i.e. G.I. Schmoe?) could creep out faster than Blur’s micromachinemotormouth once the wondrous Q&A was all over, or B.) Fangirls and boys who actually had to work late the night before or work all day (such as myself and the Queen Bri through a rigorous commercial shoot downtown), were a little lazy-eyed once the second billing hit just after 10 p.m.
True, despite how ridiculously awesome it was to see both of these 80s classics for the very first time, considering I hadn’t watched these flicks since they released in the theater, I was having a ton of trouble staying awake enough to see Cobra Commander squirm like a dying centipede. Thankfully, the Egyptian Theater was jam-packed enough and the audience was as raucous as one could be for a throwback animated flick setting. Claps were awarded for every ridiculous moment during both movies (the Credits listing “Sgt. Slaughter as Sgt. Slaughter“; basically, anything Starscream said. And, illustrator/podcaster Pat Loika was absolutely correct in saying that “the first 5-minutes of G.I. Joe: The Movie is still the best 5-minutes of G.I. Joe: The Movie.”
That opening sequence was enough to buy me enough awake time heading toward’s the Pac’s Time final hour.
When it comes to animation, Transformers appears to be a tad more dated than Joe‘s — despite the films were only made 1-year apart — but they were definitely far more, well, astronomical. Complicated gears and mechanisms were far more instrinsic to the aura of ‘Formers than the run-and-gun simplicity of the Cobras; it’s sort of like comparing Jack Kirby to Jim Lee. One is only prettier if you don’t look into it long enough and actually feel it. After 10-minutes, the art of Transformers: The Movie still holds up. It makes me wonder what would happen if former music video director Michael Bay actually shot his Transformers films like a music video.
Sure that level of intensity would cost more than a season of Game of Thrones, but the Autobots and Decepticons would be so much more enjoyable this way.
Now, if there was any conflict I had with the 1986 cartoon film (in other words, I’m just being nitpicky here), it’s the music. It’s one-half Journey rip-off/one-half Capcom Arcade game running throughout ‘Formers, with some terribly placed music cues; whereas G.I. Joe: The Movie did a slightly better job at placing all of the impending gloom and doom. The soundtrack to Joe is far more subtle. But, of course, both theme songs are to die for; and, after a while, the arcady feel of Transformers starts to become slightly hypnotic. Listening to both movies, especially ALL THAT CHEESE is a treat.
The funny thing about these movies (hahaha, OK; everything is funny about these movies) is that the stars of the movies don’t even receive top billing. No– the little then known voice actors, like, uhhh, Peter Cullen, weren’t even billed; yet, instead some actor from some movie Citizen Kane (and the man who had people leaping off buildings in fear of a just another Skrull invasion), Orson Welles, and our late friend Leonard Nimoy (who you can absolutely read all about right here), took the nameplates, despite the fact they played some villains who didn’t even have the name Megatron. Same went for the Joes, when Mr. Miami Vice a.k.a. The Colonel received his name in lights for Lt. Falcon, despite the fact that both Duke and Flint had his ass in rank. Hey, it’s show business. The voice work on both movies was incredible.
Now, onto believability. Ha– I kid. I kid. It’s the 80s, and you’ll see things like men turn into snakes who were once men; robots having mustaches; men who go into coma from snake bites to the heart (I swear, man!); cassette tape robot dogs or cassette tapes that turn into robot dogs or cassette tapes or robot dogs are just awesome; Gamora was originally lavender; cartoon robot toys that we played with at 5-11 years old using the S-word; Fishticons! Sharkticons! BBoyticons!; and wasn’t the last time we saw “Astro Train” in action on WCW Saturday Night?
Regardless of all of the ridiculousness (and my unfortunate late-night Z’s) both of these films deserve…
….because, hey, me Moody no BOZO! Me Moody KING!
Wish you were all there.