The Weekly Worship: The most insane speech about Star Wars.. EVER!

Is this the greatest nerd-inspired improv scene of all time?

Whether the elongated 8-minute-plus rant makes this week’s “Parks & Recreation” is unsure (it better), but Patton Oswalt‘s crushing monologue gives us no choice but to tune in this Thursday at 9:30/8:30 C. And, honestly, with Disney owning all of these properties, we’d be a little silly to even find it that far-fetched!

Sure a film as close to this reality would likely release in the year 2039. Either way, I’ll be waiting.

—————————————————————————————————————————————-

Fanpages can be annoying. You’re scrolling down the Facebook Wall in search of some interesting bits and knowledge from your pals — since you’re obviously too lazy to call, or even text — and there’s countless posts, pictures and videos of bands, movies and TV shows you liked 7-years ago. Fans are posting up artwork, which is cool; but you can’t help but find it difficult to get straight to all the good on Geek Culture.

Well, allow the reformed God Hates Geeks fanpage to take that senseless time off your hands.

“Join us, you wretched FOOLS!” – Random Sith Master

With the help of Expert Nerd-News Compiler, a sort of a “Solid Waste Engineer” moniker for “man who spends too much time on the inter-web,” Steven John Vasquez (@SteveOfSteel) — who’s also quite the comic illustrator himself (click here for some mighty sketches) — GHG promises to slay your skull with all the latest news, posters, trailers, previews and annoying rumors our incredibly awesome culture has to offer.

Now breath.

We’re thankful for the many who have joined us in the past month and we promise to not stop bringing you the goods. See, what separates Us from the perhaps more money-advanced rest is our agenda. We have none. For, we both simply love and hate everything equally. Okay, so perhaps this Moody Monsignor has preferred Star Wars lately over a ton of much else.. but, regardless, our slant will always be the same.

Click on the GHG icon above and join the congregation (a.k.a. “like” the page, dammit!). If nothing else, just give us one more person to bother with our bullshit.

Peace.

  • The Evil Within! There’s been a lot of evil going on in the world lately, especially in my hometown of Boston, Massachusetts. But, without delving too much about this past Monday’s tragedy, the ongoing manhunt, or the cancellation of the Boston Comic Con (yup, sad but true), you can’t blame us for not having much of a stomach for certain evil. But since this is Bethesda, the publishers of such mega-hits like Skyrim and Dishonored, we’ll pay attention — even if this video hits a little too close to home. It’s a bit of a bummer that this “trailer” serves more like a teaser for an episode of “American Horror Story” than anything that uses a gamepad.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zc-jvqJV4SI

  • Parish Picks of the Week. Ahh.. so many good comics, so many tough choices. Batwoman #19 returns to spectacular form as artist Trevor McCarthy does what he does best and lays off trying to emulate J.W. Williams III — cause that shit just ain’t happening. The prologue to the Trinity War, in this week’s Justice League #19, keeps rolling in high quality, too, thanks to artist Ivan Reis. I mean, the man even draws a bad ass bearded Superman.
    Oh no she didn’t!

    And it doesn’t hurt that Geoff Johns throws a jealous Batman to intrude on the trinity love triangle. A war between Bruce and Clark over Diana? Sure beats slapping around fish. Hey, even B.M.B.’s Age of Ultron #6 was excellent this week.. and proves that, despite a slower pace than a snail bathing in Pennzoil, this event could easily kick the snot out of the crossover crap spewed from Marvel the past 2-years. Ahh, go figure that it’s non-continuity. I think. Hell, Wolverine hunts down Pym, and even “teams” with Invisible Woman. The parallel stories in the Savage Land should keep the heart pumping. There’s also toss up this week between Captain America #6 and Daredevil #25. Despite Matty Murdock facing his roughest opponent yet — a dude dressed up in his late dad’s boxing robe? — the artwork and levity coming from this Sci-Fi Cap story was too much to overcome. Writer-extraordinaire Rick Remender is really pulling out all the stops, John Romita Jr. is drawing his best stuff since World War Hulk and Dean White is killing it on the colors. The palettes are so tasty I want to bake them, but then I would probably cause another apartment fire. Rounding out our choices was Wonder Woman #.. you guessed it.. 19. Are you bored of this choice every single damn month yet? Hope not. Imagine Brian Azzarello’s 100 Bullets fleshed in a modern God of War. Crazy talk. In this issue, Diana Prince stops getting pushed around by the sexual advances of Orion with some smooching of her own; her conversation with War is frighteningly ironic; witness more of Poseidon’s bizarre inhuman transformations; and, a bad-ass crab-claw wrecking shop! Our GHG Book of the Week, no doubt.

  • Star Trek: The Game arrives Tuesday, so let’s hope that Namco/Bandai avoids the bad luck that’s plagued many of this year’s major IPs (Aliens: Colonial Wars, Defiance). Here’s a funny trailer starring the Shat.