E3 ’14 [Full Parish Preview]: We Bringin’ Down Tha House!

“FATHER” RYAN FORD @nayrdrof







1.) Batman: Arkham Knight – An Arkham game on a next-gen platform… I need to change my pants. THIS GAME LOOKS FREAKIN’ SICK!!! The open world has once again been expanded to allow more dynamic game play, the story follows the cannon established and you get to drive the Batmobile! By far, this will be the most anticipated release of the year.

2.) Star Wars: Battlefront III – Though this won’t be the official title as the game is produced by another company as the original, this installment looks amazing. A first person shooter that takes place in the Star Wars universe?!?! Sign me up!

3.) The Legend of Zelda: Shard of Nightmare – It’s been far too long since Nintendo put out a decent Zelda game (Twilight Princess), and the latest edition to premier finally has the graphical capabilities to do the franchise justice. Father Ford, signing off.








1.) Dragon Age: Inquisition – Confession: I’ve never played a Dragon Age game. But since the Elder Scrolls franchise went the way of World of Warcraft (MMORPG a.k.a. massive multiplayer online role-playing game) and The Witcher 3 has been delayed till February (not to mention that game’s overall size kinda scares me), DAI is sure to be the closest thing to Skyrim one geek can get. And that Frostbite 3 engine will surely provide nerdgasmic visuals. More importantly, it’s developed by the same people who gave us Mass Effect — my favorite video game series ever. Sure, DAI’s showrunner Mark Darrah explained yesterday why there won’t be any mounted combat, yet the 4th installment of this franchise will pack plenty of character customization (race, specialized class and gender), outstanding party mechanics, and, hell, even optional romance. This justified substitute for the soon-to-be-hibernating Game of Thrones releases October 7th.

2.) Halo 5: Guardians – Um, it’s Halo. It’s Master Chief. It’s next-gen. It’s about.. doing all the things 343 attempted with Halo 4, but this time getting it right. And despite the immense success of Titanfall, no game will mean more to the Microsoft Xbox One system than Halo 5. There’s a lot of things they need to change/improve mechanically (especially those damn Warthogs goddamit), and that whole Sparton Ops weekly episodic mission thing didn’t live up to much. Yet, so long as 343 adds far more variety to their weaponry (tough to compete with the Borderlands’ and the Destiny‘s of the world…), co-op integration into story (cause everybody’s doin’ it!), and just gimme a far larger ass game, goddammuh (there’s no way we should beat this one in 8-hours!), 2015 will easily bring Halo back to the threshold of superiority.

3.) Tom Clancy’s The Division – Man, I’m tellin’ you. I pre-ordered Destiny (best game at E3 last year that wasn’t made by Respawn), the entire congregation is peeing at the thought of a next-gen Arkham (Jason Todd!), you just know I love me some NBA 2K (I’ve played a FULL season w/ playoffs 3 years in a row), and — yes, finally! — the NHL, the WWE, and Far Cry franchise are all coming to next-gen. But how can anyone sleep on Ubisoft’s track record? This game shocked everyone last year, and this year at the event, we’re only going to find out more. If you don’t know much about The Division, just know this: it’s an RPG with guns. Imagine playing an always online Elder Scrolls wrapped in a Call of Duty skin. Massive Entertainment is even creating a new engine for the new game called Snowdrop, capable of creating “a large range of varied universes, procedurally, and in an unprecedented level of detail.” Snowdrop will also utilize a “node-based development system”, meaning that everything will be covered from the AI rendering to mission scripting. Whew.








1.) Batman: Arkham Knight – Wins GHG’s PrE3 Award for Best Game!

2.) Star Wars: Battlefront III – Runner-up!

3.) The Legend of Zelda: Shard of Nightmare – Top 3!

4.) Evolve / Super Smash Bros. – Tied for 4th.

Um, two — yes TWO Wii U games ended up in our top 5? Bonkers! Thanks for joining GHG for our pre-coverage of the Electronic Entertainment Expo. The event takes place at the LA Convention Center on June 10-12, so be sure to keep it locked right here for all your video game needs.

#GHGE3 #GodHatesGeeks #NerdistE3 #WearYourKicks

And we out!